Are you guys voting multiple times or are you just shooting for the longest story here, folks?

I guess I better get crackin’.

Baseball and redundant polls, because I think I finally found a fucker that’ll work properly.

Hitting the Bosh with Minervacat and Onthecontrary and my roomie always leads to unfortunate conversations about the (probably forthcoming) SGA baseball AU. It usually also involves me scoping the nearby highrise dorms to try and figure out which one I feel would be funniest for Rodney to live in. Seriously — sometimes I hate myself.

Okay! Also! I know I’ve already put this poll up, but it’s finally like, WORKING. Humor me!

For which of the following stories would you like to see a DVD commentary? (1) It doesn’t mean you can explain the ocean (2) Cartography by Touch (3) History of Maps (4) Out of West (5) Bell Curve, or, Ladies Night at the Boom Boom Room (6) Conflicts of Interest (7) Visiting Hours (8) None of these, but I’ll answer in the comments View Results Make your own poll

Dear Ridiculous Crush On Michael Weatherly, So we meet again.

Long, long ago, I sat around in my teeniness and watched Dark Angel and had big, throbby love for Logan Cale, idealistic cyberjournalist (be still my fluttering heart! you need that for having this babies!) WHO WEARS GLASSES and HACKS TV to give messages to a post-apocalyptic populace about the corruptions of their government. Logan was one of my first serious “No seriously, I would give you a drive by blowjob if only you walked past me on the street” victims listmembers, because (a) muckraking, truthseeking, glasses-wearing (nnngh) journalist and (b) Dude, he knows how to live elegantly. I’m going to be spending a lot of time in Seattle this summer wondering if possibly, even though I’d hate for James Cameron to be right about you know, a giant electromagnetic pulse knocking out all computer systems and sundry complications therein, Logan Cale is real? And possibly only canonically four years younger than I am and there for TOTALLY LEGALLY TAPPABLE?

My recent glomming onto NCIS for my hit of procedural drama-ness has resulted in a lot of throwbacks to teenaged fits of lust — which of course sent me trolling for information:

For those of you who have seen NCIS and remember the throwaway line in S1? About some guy who had tons of bank because he was the original importer of Swiss Army Knives into the country? I THINK THAT WAS ACTUALLY MICHAEL’S DAD. HIS MULTIMILLIONAIRE DAD WHO CUT HIM OUT OF THE FAMILY WHEN HE DECIDED TO PURSUE ACTING. SO BASICALLY: DINOZZO IS MICHAEL WEATHERLY.

This is what happens when you think of NO BACKSTORY for a character because it’s a procedural drama! Michael Weatherly worked in the tape library at ABC after being cut off to support his acting habit! He has a son! His son is named AUGUST. I — ! I — ! It’s all too much for me, really. D: D: D: Why haven’t he and I already made babies? I MEAN JUST LOOK AT HIM. GOD.

Of course, thinking about NCIS makes me think about Michael Weatherly makes me think about Dark Angel makes me think about what an APPALLING actress Jessica Alba was and still is to this day. Like seriously, I’m not kidding. Even though that sexual chemistry in the show (mmm) was sizzling off of the screen? She was just so bad — at everything. Which is only highlighted by the fact that if I’m to get my Michael Weatherly in glasses hit, I have to watch the damn show. Life = difficult.

House M.D. 3×22 “Resignation” and Fandom leads to hazardous driving practices. Lawd.

Firstly, if you were driving on I-40 yesterday around 11:40ish in the morning and saw a slightly erratic Corolla and thought, “I wish I could punch that motherfucker,” I APOLOGIZE SINCERELY because I was definitely choking I was laughing so God damn hard I was sort of blind. Because when you’re listening to God damn Gym Class Heroes singing “Cupid’s Chokehold” and mentally vidding to SGA it can only end in tragedy. God, if you haven’t heard this wretched awful song you won’t understand why I am — even now — crapping myself laughing at the thought of this + SGA. COME ON.

THIS IS TOTALLY A LETTER THAT RODNEY WRITES ABOUT JOHN. GOD. I’M SORRY. I’LL GET TO HOUSE IN SECOND, I HAVE TO FALL DOWN AND WEEP LAUGHING SOME MORE NOW. God just — “She even makes me pancakes. And Alka-Seltzer when my tummy aches. If that ain’t love then I don’t know what love is.” — it’s SO JOHN AND RODNEY, ALL RIGHT? Clearly I am going through new episode withdrawal something awful.

And in other news, House last night:

Sometimes, I love fandom. I really really love fandom.

So today, after a night of drinking $1.50 domestic drafts and eating pizza and watching Infernal Affairs (which is, oh my God, folks, one of the hottest movies you’ll ever see) with my padres I opened up my email to find a HILARIOUS note from Tafadhali who said, and I quote: “And — I don’t know if you have a strong mental image of Dr. Holloway [from Bang] or something, but I — maybe because he’s so earnest? and is, like, inches away from calling John a “brave little soldier”? — always picture him as Jared Padalecki.” And then, ya’ll? Attached art:

Because it’s true. Sam Winchester’s BitchFace (TM) of caring, it’s money.

And FOR THE WIN:

Battered spouse John. Note the file name — I like to think of it as a command.

Send Tafadhali email — now, now, now, saying “UR AWESOME!!!1!” at mrtafadhali at yahoo dot com.

Okay, and then sometimes referrer logs are hilarious.

Referrer logs, and why I love slash hate them.

D: D: D: D:

So I just told my roommate, “I am in a zenlike state of happiness.”

And it’s true — I am. Today, folks, I took my last university exam. No more required courses for my major, no more swim tests or economics prerequisites. No more reading monthly figures on Durable Goods sales and slight fluctuations in frictional employment unless I’m getting paid for it: FOLKS I AM FREE. Excuse me while I twirl around half drunk and delirious with joy. Today, I drank Dirty Southern Girls (Minervacat and Onthecontrary(tm)) and watched some UNC freshman named Will kick ass on college Jeopardy and IT WAS UNRESERVEDLY AWESOME.

I was going to do this gigantic “So Guess What Horrible Slash Amazing Things I Found On The Internet Today!” post, but I figured, why bother with the effort of coding when I could just you know, link you to my artdump folder and let you dig through in shame on your own.

DVD Commentary?

Take the poll

Free Poll by Blog Flux

I cannot sleep. So neither shall you. I’m taking you down with me.

I worried briefly that this was inappropriate content to just put on a webpage but then I was like, “What the fuck — these are all perverts anyway.”

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the source material, it’s Roy Mustang (blue uniform at the desk) and Ed Elric (where he belongs: on his knees like the hot piece of twink he is), and they’re totally living the dream.

I have no idea what fanartist drew this, but all I can say is that it might be the hottest thing evar.