Why so glum, Gorgeous?


AU were Steve writes speeches for the president, and Bucky is the president’s sullen, ivy-league disappointment of an only son

The problem is that Steve’s first impression of Bucky is from a literal decade ago.

Bucky had been turning nine at the most joylessly inside-the-beltway birthday party of all time: flawlessly catered, attended more heavily by private security, secret service, and consular security than kids. Bucky had been wearing khaki shorts, boat shoes, and a fucking pink Lacoste tshirt – all over it overlaid with a pre-teen ennui and unhappiness shared by most of the classmates at his fucking Quaker private school. Exacerbating the situation had been the knowledge that his parents were more or less ignoring the proceedings in favor of some asshole in a cheap suit that had showed up an hour ago clutching a stack of papers two inches deep.

At the time, nine-year-old Bucky had no way of knowing that the dishwater blond at his parents’ dining room would flourish into the most upsettingly attractive human being in the world. That he should probably lay off arranging for Steve to be covered in banana pudding and cake in a fit of brattiness, because at some not-at-all-distant point in the future Bucky would be old enough and drunk enough to use the words “hunger for his dick,” unironically at a shitty bar in Georgetown.

And now that Bucky is celebrating his 19th birthday at a similarly joyless party, with similarly joyless people, the major difference is that it’s not his parents’ attention he wants from the trio sequestered away in the formal dining room, whittling away at his mom’s state of the union speech.


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